On and Off Again Relationships

Do you feel like your relationship is going great and then all of a sudden you have the urge to break up with them? Then a couple of days later, you decide to get back together?

On and off relationships mean that there are problems that are not solvable. When you find that you have the same issues over and over again, it means that you or your partner are not willing to compromise and it can be a good time for the relationship to come to a real end.

If you want to have a future with your partner, you should not have to be in a relationship where things are disrespectful or where things are unstable or uncertain.

If you are in a relationship right now and you wonder if you should move forward or let them go, you have to figure out what the relationship means to you and figure out if you are willing to take advice from others or if you are just going to deal with the on and off relationship.


One of the reasons that most people stay in a relationship that doesn’t work is because they are afraid of being alone. They might stay with their partner because they are afraid that any other relationship would be the same.

They might see their future in a different version of what they are in and so they stay with their partner for all the wrong reasons.

If you get together, it will seem that it would be easier than just starting over and this is a stigma that many people seem to face.

If you are stuck in a toxic relationship, this is something that you can allow yourself to get stuck in.

Maybe you have been together with someone for years and you feel that if you are fighting or not getting alone, it is still too hard to leave.


The key to any good relationship is to communicate. You have to be able to talk and figure out if you are a good match for your partner.

Think about the issues that you are facing and if they are too many or too much, maybe saying goodbye is the best idea.

If you have a boyfriend that has completely different values or the ideas of the future than you, settling down and getting married might not be the goal that you want to set.

Being to the point where you are sick and tired of the fighting might push you to let things go and to realize that neither of you are willing to compromise.

Having a relationship only for sex can cause you to question if you are making bad choices. If he cannot support, you or make you happy then you will realize that things will not work out well and you can choose to walk away.

Gut Feeling

Pay attention to what your gut is telling you and if your gut tells you it is time to walk away, do it. DO not ignore your gut and do not settle. Stop investing your life for people that are not willing to invest back to you.

When you find love and do not expect it, it can be a great thing. You will see that your life can work out and your relationship can be strong.

Learn to be on the same page with the person you want to date and if things do not feel real or feel off, get away while you can. Do not be with someone because you feel better than being alone.

If you feel that things are not going in the direction you want them to, it is probably best to move on in your relationship.

Standing Up for Who You Are

Being comfortable does not make a relationship great. When you find out that your communication with your partner is not what you thought, it can cause you to look differently on your relationship.

You should never settle in a toxic relationship and you need to understand that being familiar does not always make a relationship happy.

Whatever you need in your life can come to you, but you have to get out of relationships that are unhealthy and depressing. When you learn the importance of seeing your worth, you will realize that you can stand up for yourself and find someone that makes you feel loved and special.

Even if you have dated someone for a long time, learn to move forward or to hold on but do not settle for an on and off again relationship. Even if you are sad to let them go, it can be the best thing for you.


Each relationship is going to be different and it is important to make sure that you have goals to work towards. Make sure that you are with someone that makes you happy and makes you feel safe and if not, learn to say goodbye and move forward in your life.

Dating a Friend

Relationships are hard and when a friendship begins to be a romance, this can be a hard and tricky change for you and your partner. When you have a friendship that is on the line, dating your friend that you have known for years can be one of the best things ever, but it can also be the scariest things ever.

Deciding if you are going to date might be the hardest thing. You might be worried that they will not return your feelings or that you will lose your best friend in the process.

Even though none of us know the future, some people believe that it is possible to date a friend but if they do not return your love, you can still salvage the friendship.

There are always going to be challenges in dating and this can be even more challenging when you are dating a friend. Sometimes, some believe that when you want to fall in love, nothing is better than being more than friends.

Pros and Cons of Dating a Friend

Before you tell your friend that you love them, you have to figure out all of the outcomes that could happen. You might feel that being romantically involved with your friend is not worth it because it could end with hard feelings.

Or if you decide to pursue it, make sure that you are accepting of the different outcomes that could happen and you take a chance that they might not like you beyond a friend.

Signs They are Interested

You can tell if someone is interested or has feelings for you and even if you think someone is attracted to you, make sure that you are making the right decision before you make a move.

If you have been friends with someone for a long time, make sure that your partner is really interested in you.

Here are some signs that he might be into you:

  • They want to spend more time with you than with their friends.
  • They are intimate in their details.
  • They want to meet the family.
  • They get jealous of other people.
  • They flirt.
  • They touch or make eye contact.


Telling your crush your feelings can cause them to be caught off guard and can cause there to be pressure. Make sure that you are going to stay friends no matter what. If you are going to try to take things to the next level, tell your friend that you just want to share what you are feeling and you do not expect them to feel the same.

Your friend deserves to have time to think things over. Give them time and space to figure out what they want and do not be mad at them if they tell you no.

Turned Down

One of the worst things that can happen is if your crush does not feel the same about you. Maybe they will tell you that they just want to be friends and they just love hanging out.


There are going to be challenges in all relationships and friends first couples might have more hurdles.

Being a great friend can mean that there are strong feelings but if you like them and they are mutual in their feelings, they can date and there might be romance involved. The problem is, what if attraction is missing and what if you later realize that you are not in love with them, but you just wanted to be with them because you enjoyed them.

Breakups are hard and breaking up with someone that was a close friend can feel like you have lost everything. It can be harder and more emotional. When you realize you do not love them, it can break their heart and be one of the hardest things you ever have to say.

It is possible to stay friends after a breakup but once you were friends and you dated, things will never be the same and it will be hard to keep the friendship together after you break up.

If he or she begins to date someone new, this an make it even harder because they have to share the hard relationship part with each other, and it will feel like you have lost a friend and a lover.

Best Case

On the other side, if your friend becomes your partner and you end up having a long-term relationship, what could be better.

Going from friends to romance can have great benefits such as you always being honest with each other, the trust that comes with being friends and learning to see each other in different lights. You already know them as your friend and now you get to know them more.

Transform Your Relationship

Conflict happens in many conversations and you can tell that there is going to be conflict almost right when someone starts to talk. When people are married, most of the time when divorces happen it happens because of arguments and conflicts that people cannot seem to get past.

It seems that most of the conversations start the same and end up in a fight. When you start a conversation aware of what you are going to say or if you decide that you are going to allow the emotions of your partner or your own emotions to trigger you to be defensive, it can cause conflicts with your partner.

When you are aware of what you are feeling when you talk to someone, you allow there to be a softer way to communicate. This can cause you to have a more intimate connection.

There are times when you feel that you are going to have a conversation and it is going to be biased and cause you to be against them in the conversation. When you have this bias, you will see that you will react to something and often not even realize the strong response that you are having. Once you realize this is happening, you can change the way that you talk to your partner.

First, being gentle is a way that you can soften the conversation from the beginning. You have to learn to be receptive and to share what you are feeling with an open area that you can say what you need to each other. You can state your perspective, but you also have to learn to accept what your partner is saying without blaming them or making them feel wrong because of their point of view.

When you approach a conversation in a hurry or being upset, it can cause you to be defensive and protective and this does not allow you to have empathy for other people or to hear what they want to say to you.

Approaching a conversation aggressively will make you feel upset and will put you and your partner in the defensive mode and cause them not to be able to hear what you or they are trying to say.

You have to learn to stop being blunt and stop approaching conflict in a way that the conversation will spiral out of control. Doing this will make your partner feel like you are blaming them or them being afraid to talk to you because they don’t know how you will react.

Conversations that have a lot of tension will cause there to be an immediate disconnect instead of a connection that can leave you feeling loved and heard. We have to decide what kind of cycle we are going to have when we decide to converse with people. Will you leave them feeling loved and protected or unloved and not valued?

No matter what kind of conversation you are having, you need to have a good intention. Look inside of yourself and figure out what you are doing wrong and figure out how to approach communication in the right way. Put your heart into the conversation and have patience and be aware as to how you are making the other person feel. Is your conversation coming from your heart? If the answer is no, this can lead to disagreements.

Change the way that you talk to people and this can make your relationship different. There are ways that you can soften yourself so that your relationship can be stronger.


Be aware of what you are feeling before you start talking to your partner. Make sure you are not having conversations where you are accusing them or if it is a touchy topic, be careful how you react.

Being aware is the key to being able to focus on what you are saying and being aware of what your heart is feeling. If you start talking and you realize you are feeling in a bad mood or you are angry, this is not the best time to talk to your partner.

Imagine the times where you have talked to someone and you have acted aggressively or angrily because you did not create a safe space to talk and you were not able to handle your emotions well. When you are aware of what you are doing, you will be aware of when the right time to talk is.

Slow Down

One reason that conflicts come in communication is because the conversation moves too fast. When you are reacting in this way, it can cause you not to be able to fix the problem. Even though you feel like you are responding from the right place in your heart, you have to make sure that you and your partner are being heard.

Slow down and figure out what you are really feeling. Explore your feelings inside and do not hide your emotions even when they are upsetting. Let your partner know what you are feeling and identify if you are happy, sad or even mad.

When you slow down, you allow your mind to connect with your body and you learn to express yourself without being so vulnerable. This can cause you not to accuse and to share your emotions in a compassionate and connected way.


Sometimes when we argue we think we are solving problems. We cannot do this if we do not understand things from our partners point of view. We do not always have to explain ourselves but sometimes we need to step back and allow our partner to be heard.

Make sure you are actively listening to what they are trying to tell you, and this can build trust and intimacy in your relationship. Do not interrupt and do not explain things, just allow them to talk.

When they finish speaking, repeat what they are sharing with you and let them know you heard them. Your partner wants to know that you are connected with them and this can bring a level of intimacy that you may not have had in the past.


These practices will help to save you from arguing and having terrible conversations. Learn to connect with your partner and to feel intimate with them both in body and in conversation. This can be impactful in your relationship and can allow there to be a beauty when you speak and communicate with each other.

Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationships can be one of the hardest ways of loving someone because living far away can take away from your relationship. The truth is thought, a long-distance relationship can work and people even far away from each other can make things work out well.

When you have dated someone for a long time, you might see that time separates you and that it makes things harder but you know that you can live a happy and long life together as long as you work hard towards it.

Even though you will miss the person that you are in a relationship with, you can have peace in knowing that your life with them can work out and that you can love each other regardless of distance.

It would come to a point where you can face challenges and frustration when long distance dating is happen and you might not be able to see each other nearly as much as you want to but the bond can still be strong.

If you want to be with someone that is far away from you, you have to understand that you might face a point where you have different life paths and where you have different areas that you live in. This can cause you to worry and not to be sure of the future.


Once you realize that you can be a victim or you can work things out, you can learn that distance does not always affect your relationship, but it can make you stronger. There are some things you can learn to help you in your long-distance relationship that can make you stronger such as:


When you are in a long-distance relationship, communication is the key. You have to learn to laugh and have meaningful communication with your partner. Even when you are fighting, you should call them and talk to them.

Do little things such as send out postcards and pictures of yourself to your partner so that they can have things from you while they are far away from you.

Know that you will not always hear from each other on a daily basis due to schedules and time but you have to do what you can to make sure that you are available to each other and that you are able to understand the struggles and the problems with long distance dating.

By being open in communication, the lines of distance will not keep you upset, and you will be able to be a team and get closer to each other.


When you doubt your partner because you are not close to each other, you have to challenge these doubts. Why are you having them? You have to know that you can trust your partner and if you cannot then doubt will creep in.

When you have love and laughs together, it can make things easy but when things get hard and doubt starts to set in, you have to learn to see things from a different point of view.

Be Clear

Take time to be clear on what you want. You cannot make this person out to be better than you and a superhero and you have to know that just like you, they are human.

Learn about each other and learn to not be afraid to show your flaws. There will be challenges in all relationships and when you learn to put your mind together you will see that you can create a future together, even if it only starts as a vision. Learn to respect each other with your whole heart.


Each time you can spend time together, make sure that it is quality time and that you treat each other good and you laugh, a lot. Make sure that you act like a friend and a lover and not an enemy when you spend time together rather over the phone or in person.

Visit them as much as you can and save money so that you can visit more. Spend time together as a couple when you are with them and make sure that you do not let the distance get in your way. Learn that distance is not equal to emotions and that you have to learn to accept the hard times as well as the good times.


There are ways that you can be happy with the distance and you have to learn to understand what the challenges are and how you can fight against them. If you love this person, you have to learn to accept that there is distance between you and let it bring you together instead of apart.

Causes of Psychic Awakening

Psychic awakenings are real, but most are not aware of what really causes one. Since we are all born with intuition, it is there, but most of us are taught to ignore this intuition in favor of logic. Some people are also naturally psychic, but their intuitive gifts are never utilized which is relatively sad. This is leaving the most magical parts of ourselves on the table, untouched. Sometimes, we find this ability and take hold of it in such a way that life is better than ever imagined. This is often due to a psychic awakening.

There are several causes or reasons for a psychic awakening that reminds us of the ability that was born in each of us. These are shared below.

Trauma or Near-Death Experience

There are a few people who have had their psychic awakening following something traumatic. One medium had her awakening following a severe car accident that left her comatose, another also had an accident that caused his gifts to be awakened. Accidents are sometimes a doorway that allows our psychic and/or mediumship abilities to be opened up and revealed. There is no deep understanding of why this is often the case, but one theory is that a near-death event forces us closer to the Spirit and serves as a reminder that we are spiritual beings.

Along the same lines, trauma, such as illness or even abuse, can cause a psychic awakening. Those who have battled a long-term illness can learn to recognize their abilities as they recover. Victims of abuse learn to rely on intuition for survival at times and this builds the connection to the spirit. They then become more sensitive to energy that surrounds people and things, increasing ability.

Death of a Loved One

When a loved one passes it is one of the most difficult experiences we can have. For some, knowing about the afterlife helps them feel closer to the divine and they are able to live a more authentic life following the death of someone close. This puts them in touch with inner feelings that can lead to a psychic awakening. This can happen for two reasons.

The first is that losing a loved one can cause people to seek spiritual comfort and in doing so rediscover their own divine essence, connecting with the soul. This is where intuition is found. The other is that after a loved one passes, the people left behind may begin to notice an increase in psychic ability as they start receiving “signs from their loved one”. This recognition of signs from above can heighten personal sensitivity to all spirit type energy.

New Birth

Many people, predominantly women, will notice an increase in intuition after a new baby is born or adopted. They will know intuitively what a child needs or wants. This is a natural, intuitive doorway to the intuitive realm and spirit.


Sometimes healings, those that are spiritual in nature, can ignite psychic ability. Things like past life regression, cranial sacral therapy, and other spiritual healing forms can shift consciousness and awaken psychic gifts.

Are You in a Relationship with an Old Soul?

There will come a time in most of our lives when we meet someone who feels familiar, like we have known them before even if it is a first meeting. We will have no way to logically explain the feeling, yet we may sense that something life changing is about to happen. These souls, regardless of actual age, race, or gender, show up spontaneously and create profound ripples that carry for years. All of this happens with a quiet word and loving presence. This person is likely an old soul.

Old Soul Defined

There are certain people in life who have outlooks and perspectives that vary greatly from most. These people perceive the world through the weathered eyes of an old person, not a young person. These people are often said to be wise beyond their years and may feel somewhat alienated from others. Still, there is a profound interconnectedness with life and a deep understanding even when they are children. The old soul is a natural sage, counselor and mystic that can provide guidance and support to others for a lifetime.

Having someone who is an old soul be part of your life is a huge blessing, yet it is very easy to take for granted. If you are fortunate enough to be part of this type of relationship, express gratitude for all the guidance and support they provide. If you are not sure you are in a relationship with an old soul, then look for the following signs.


An old soul tends to mimic behaviors of old people. They like to relax and unwind at home without a need to go out often. The mind is much more stimulating than the rest of the world, so why go out. If you are with an old soul, they will prefer to stay home.


Old souls are refreshed by solitude and find it restorative in nature. This is where they feel in touch with the core of life. Because of this, the old soul is content to spend long periods of time alone without concern. Since they have limited psychological energy to begin with, the old soul is thankful for alone time spent reading, tending gardens, or even completing a small project.

Little Things

Old souls treasure the little things in life and the small moments. They may place importance on watching a specific show together or long walks. The commonplace moments of intimacy are what they delight in as they see them as sincere. Knowing life is unpredictable, the old soul realizes transience in everything. This is why it is important to capture simple joys when possible.


Old souls walk to their own, quiet drums. This is their nature. Since they have different outlooks from most, they see the fallacies of social conditioning and seek truth that is often obscured. This may cause them to be odd in their fashion choices, mannerisms, beliefs, and perspectives. While they still appreciate tolerance and acceptance in relationships, it may be of eccentricities.

Profound Connections

For a relationship with an old soul to be successful, you must know the old soul is not about superficial connections. Old souls want to connect on deep, profound levels so the deepest of thoughts, dreams, and perspectives can be shared. This will bond you and them. Without this type of connection, they will move on.


Old souls are great teachers. Whether you need to learn to be empathetic, learn to accept others and yourself, or learn to be more gracious, an old soul can help. Old souls serve as both lovers and teachers, companions and mentors. While this odd mixture can cause problems, it can also be a perfect combination for long term happiness. Even if the relationship with an old soul ends, you will likely still admire and feel grateful for them and the lessons they taught.

There When Your Need It

Old souls are often a rock unless teaching you about fortitude or resilience. They are in it for the long haul, through thick and thin, even when life is unpredictable. Their ability to stay calm can get you through the darkest times of life allows you to trust immensely.

Elegant Taste

Many old souls are not really romantic in the traditional sense, but when they make an effort, their approach has that old world charm. They delight in sensitivity and symbolism. They may kiss your hand, pick a single flower, light candles, or offer jewelry as a symbolic piece. Whatever they choose to do, it will be full of meaning and significance.

No Games

Many couples get wrapped up in relationship ‘games’ that they believe create drama, but the old soul is not interested in playing or enabling such. If you are in a relationship with an old soul, expect a stern response to such games. They give and expect respect and will not waste time with such things.

Brutally Honest

Old souls appreciate and expect honesty for a loving, balanced relationship. If you are with an old soul, they will put emphasis on honesty from you and themselves. They will share whatever is on their mind and expect you to do the same.

May Seem Indifferent

The old soul does not see life as serious as others. They understand the reality of impermanence, so they never get overly attached to much of anything, whether good or bad. This can be interpreted incorrectly as being uncaring, but they are simply enjoying their balanced ride in their way.

Give and Expect Freedom

The best thing about being with an old soul is that they give you freedom over yourself and prefer you do the same for them. They want you to do your own thing without condition, but want you to be honest about it. They will be supportive of dreams and endeavors, but you must do the same for them if it is to last.

Unconditional Love

Old souls are able to accept most things pretty easily. While they may love you no matter what because they see your inner beauty, they will not be used. The get that a healthy relationship is about give and take, but if you are selfish or cheating and do not correct it, they will not be a martyr.

Less Likely to Cheat

Old souls are not saints, but they are not always that interested in sex or cheating. They prefer to be drama and conflict free, at least as much as possible. The old soul will be more likely to share feelings and thoughts with a partner than sexual acts. They are sexually active, but are rarely libido controlled.


Old souls will always give more than they take. If you are with an old soul, they will leave you feeling smarter, better, and an improved version of yourself, even if you do not stay together.


Take the time to think of all your old soul friend or partner has done for your life and enriched your world. Think about expressing thanks for all they do and have done because it is easy to take for granted. Enjoy this special opportunity to connect with someone so special before the mindlessness of life gets in the way.

Long Distance Relationships that Work

We are very connected in our world and we have the chance to meet new people and to find people all over the world. We don’t have to wait to find love because of the lack of opportunity and sometimes you can even find love thousands of miles away from where you live.

Having a long-distance relationship used to happen and people had a hard time making it work. Someone might move far away for a job or go into the military. People would have to learn to adapt to these changes and make room in their heart for this to be.

Now, we can have long distance relationships and with things such as the internet, we can even meet people purposefully that life far away.

There are challenges that long-distance relationships have that regular ones do not have but you can make it work if you try.

Here are some challenges with long distance relationships:

  • Having money to travel to where the new love lives.
  • Negotiating distances.
  • Not having long face-to face time.
  • Having trouble with the view of the relationship.
  • Having strong emotions.

Finances are a big deal when you are involved in a long-term relationship because flying is expensive and even if you drive, it can be costly buying food and having a place to stay when you visit.

It can be hard to manage a long-term relationship and people can sometimes get jealous because they do not get to hang out with your friends and get to know them. They might face a lot of complaining and they will lack in the intimate relationship that comes when you begin to fall in love.

By having boundaries and understanding, long term relationships can come but there will always be a chance of problems.

Expectations and Reality

We spend a lot of time with someone we are with and long-term relationships are not like that. You will not have the great sex or the romantic dinners that cause there to be more bonding. You will have expectations and will often be disappointed because things won’t be how you imagined them to be.

It is hard to dismiss the feelings when a relationship is growing, and this can cause trouble with distances. You will have stress of missing each other and even if you are committed it can be questionable because you don’t see how your partner is acting.

Research shows that you will have feelings of excitement, joy, anger, jealousy and other things that can cause a fight in a long-term relationship.


You can be successful and happy even though there are challenges in long term dating. Even if you are living close together does not mean your relationship will work and things just take time. You need to have open communication and that will bring success.

Always keep positive feelings and feel safe and secure unless they give you a reason to no. Learn to communicate over the phone and on facetime or other video chats rather than just texting. It is important that you will see each other, even if it is on video streaming. You can also save money so that you can meet up regularly.

The regular rules apply just like if you are in a close term relationship such as being open in communication, be clear about your needs, have trust, be intimate and always be kind and loving. When you talk on the phone, make sure that you are not making an option but a priority.


Long distance relationships are not as personal, but you can make them as personal as you can by communicating and having positive emotions. Treat them the same way that you would if someone lived close to you and you can see the relationship work.

Being Straightforward in Dating

There are some struggles with being someone is straightforward and here are some things that can happen when you are this type of person.


There are many rules that you feel that you have to follow.  Stop following so many rules and playing hard to get, be more straightforward.


Dating rules are not always helpful and can waste your time.

Pick-Up Lines

You don’t care if there is a weird pickup line on a dating site, it just helps you get rid of the creepy people.


Stop taking so much time to communicate back and forth.  If texting is a problem for you, pick up the phone and call him.


When you are mad at someone that you are dating, don’t give hints, let them know what is going on and tell them why.


Having openness is good for you and it allows you to handle your issues.  But when you tell people that you are so open, it makes them think you might be a little crazy.

Liking You

You are okay with people not liking you and you will get over it if someone cancels on you.  You will not want to waste their time if they don’t like you.


You don’t always want to be romantic and sometimes you want to just have a drink.  You don’t have a problem telling someone that.


Being backwards does not let people see that you are cool, you don’t care though, just give yourself a drink.

Social Media

You have more fun on social media than you do actually dating or dating sites.


Even back in the day of AOL, you were kind of boring when you chatted.  You felt that people should just get to the point.


You make it clear when you want someone to do something with you and the rest of the time you are flexible.  You always have something going on anyways and you are always busy.  You don’t want them to think that there is anything wrong with you wanting your guy or girl around for your special moments, though.


You are not bossy; you just know what you want, and you are willing to ask for it. This isn’t ridiculous or selfish, just who you are.

Dating Rules

You think some dating rules are ridiculous and they turn you off.


You give your friends advice, but you want to give advice of “why are you wasting your time,” or “they aren’t good enough for you.”  You have a long list of your own rules, but you don’t think that people should go out with someone that is sending bad vibes.


You respond to texts days later and you say, ‘sorry I meant to respond to this.”

Romantic Gifts

You like gifts like flowers and chocolate, but nothing is better than a note or someone telling you how much they like you.  You wish that people were more honest, and you want to be attracted to people that are real and not fake.

Online Dating Provides Options for those over 50

Navigating the dating world in your 50s can be tough. You have children, maybe even grown children. You have a job, perhaps a demanding one. Most of all, you are out of practice so your confidence level may be low. Does it still work the same way?

Dating can be especially tough if you were in a long-term marriage that ended abruptly in death or divorce. You grew used to your spouse and the idea of having to get to know someone else and create a new history with a new person is daunting and, perhaps, a little scary.

That’s okay. Those are normal feelings. However, your fears and inhibitions shouldn’t stop you from getting out into the dating world.

One element to dating that has dramatically changed over the past decade is online dating. There are many online sites that offer ways to get to know people and have helped many find the love they truly desire.

Online dating isn’t for the faint of heart.

Here are some things to be aware of when you decide to take your love online:

  • There are various sites that fulfill different needs. Some sites are especially for those seeking serious relationships while others just introduce people for lunch or drinks. There are sites for different age categories as well and there are several that cater to the over 50 crowd. Research the different sites before you sign up.
  • Stick to reputable sites. With so many choices, there are some hoax sites that wind up at the top of the search page. Look at recommendations and ratings under each site listing to ensure you are dealing with a reputable site. Also, look at their question-and-answer section to see how you can contact someone if you have a concern or problem.

There are both free and paid dating websites and one isn’t more reputable than the other. You can try a couple of different sites to increase your chances at finding love.

  • Realize that getting yourself online will take some time. You will need to fill out an application and upload a decent picture. That can present a couple of obstacles.

First, getting a decent picture to upload can be an issue if you don’t have a recent professional one. It would be best to go ahead and get a photographer or a good friend to take a couple rather than upload an old one or one where you aren’t at your best. It is best to not use a phone selfie because those can look odd.

Your first obstacle may be simply asking someone to help you with a picture. Some people are embarrassed they are seeking love online and don’t want anyone to know. A good friend to confide in for help is a great solution that comes with no judgement.

The same goes for filling out the application. Some people aren’t as computer literate as others, so ask for help if you need it. If you are insistent on close friends or family not knowing your plans, go to the public library. You can get a media specialists to help you with the computer application without any questions or fuss.

  • Be honest with yourself and on your application. Many put down what they think others will like. Be your real self. That will go a long way to attracting the right person for you.

This is a good time to rediscover yourself, your interests and your passions. Be sure to get to know yourself in this process. It wouldn’t hurt to pick up a new hobby or hairstyle to create conversation and give you more confidence.

  • Understand some of the nuances of being over 50 may pop up with you or your date. Either of you may have unique family situations and obligations that could be somewhat challenging. The best thing to do is stand up for yourself and tell your family you need some time to yourself.

Another issue could be emotional baggage you’re carrying around from the last relationship. Be aware of that and understand a new relationship doesn’t necessarily have to fit the pattern of your last relationship.

Finally, another issue could be your own lack of self-confidence or a negative self-image. You don’t look like you did at 20, 30 or even 40. What you have is wisdom and life experience that is worthy of sharing.

  • Put the time into developing a new relationship. You spend a good bit of time filling out the application and looking online, so there is no reason to waste that effort by not following through with conversations and possibly meeting. Don’t be afraid to take the next step.

The next step after introductions is to chat in a private chat room on the dating website. You can get more personal with a possible date this way and decide if you want to pursue it.

Remember to keep safety rules in mind when arranging to meet someone. Meet in a public place like a restaurant. Don’t give them your home address or even cell phone number but communicate through the dating app. Get to know them a while before providing them with personal information.

Also remember there can be scammers seeking out potential victims on online sites. Unfortunately, older daters are targeted because of their lack of online savviness and their vulnerability after ending a long-term relationship. While reputable sites are great at verifying their users, don’t assume all are verified. Be wary of people who want to move too fast and shut it down if they hint they need money.

  • Move beyond the first page of the dating site. Expand your reach. Talk to people in public chat rooms. Get to know others in a friendly way.

Online dating can be beneficial if you take it slow and put in the time to get to know people. Don’t look at it with a targeted approach of finding someone to spend your life with but view it as a growth process for you. It’s a chance to get to know a lot of different people, to find out about them, develop friendships, get to expand your horizons and find out more about yourself.

When you take that approach, online dating becomes fun and comfortable without the pressure. That gives you the best chance at finding true love.

When Your Soulmate is Looking for You

When you have a soulmate, and we all do, you will realize that you will get to a point where you are seeking them.  The good thing is, they are seeking you as well.

When you find that you want inspiration and joy in your life, you will notice that you might be attracted more to love.  You will seek divine answers and find that the journey of love is sometimes hard.

You might wonder why finding love is so hard but if you are looking for your soulmate, know that your heart is very wise and it knows what you have desired in your soul.  Your future self will come towards you and your soulmate will be working towards finding you.

When you find your soulmate, you will be thankful that you waited.  You will realize that this is more than a relationship and more than just an attraction to a man.  The great thing is, your soulmate wants the same things that you want and when you meet them, you will have a happy and healthy relationship with them.  Even your world will be turned upside down from his love.

The problem is that you can add blockages to your path because you date other people that you don’t really want to commit to.  You will compromise and find other people, and this will slow down your soulmate coming to you.

You may also find that you are not able to get past hurts in your past and this can cause you not to trust others.  When you doubt who you are, you don’t want other people coming into your life and you repeat this in your relationships instead of facing them.

You need to make sure that you are not standing in the way of your love.


You need to make sure that you are not in dead-end relationships and that you do not let yourself keep getting broken hearted again and again.  You must learn to let this go and move on from relationships that are unhealthy for you.

When you think about your vibrational frequency, when you have a high frequency, you will attract that and that is what your soulmate is made of.  You must go into wanting a relationship with joy and focus.  You must have self-love and happiness before you even begin a relationship.

Date someone and make sure that you know he or she is the one.  Let love win but do not go out of your way to be pleasing to someone that you know is not meant to be with you.  Time is short and this can hold you back.

Open your heart to yourself and to others and let your soulmate come.  By committing to this, you will open up your heart.

Learn to be open to relationships that are healthy for you and make sure that you are ready to be in a relationship before your soulmate comes.


Waiting for your soulmate can seem hard but you have to have enough respect for yourself and your soulmate that you are willing to wait until the right time.

The universe knows when it is time for you to meet your soulmate and so you have to always be open and ready.  You can be ready by being prepared in what life is meant to bring you and embracing it before your love comes.