Transform Your Relationship

Conflict happens in many conversations and you can tell that there is going to be conflict almost right when someone starts to talk. When people are married, most of the time when divorces happen it happens because of arguments and conflicts that people cannot seem to get past.

It seems that most of the conversations start the same and end up in a fight. When you start a conversation aware of what you are going to say or if you decide that you are going to allow the emotions of your partner or your own emotions to trigger you to be defensive, it can cause conflicts with your partner.

When you are aware of what you are feeling when you talk to someone, you allow there to be a softer way to communicate. This can cause you to have a more intimate connection.

There are times when you feel that you are going to have a conversation and it is going to be biased and cause you to be against them in the conversation. When you have this bias, you will see that you will react to something and often not even realize the strong response that you are having. Once you realize this is happening, you can change the way that you talk to your partner.

First, being gentle is a way that you can soften the conversation from the beginning. You have to learn to be receptive and to share what you are feeling with an open area that you can say what you need to each other. You can state your perspective, but you also have to learn to accept what your partner is saying without blaming them or making them feel wrong because of their point of view.

When you approach a conversation in a hurry or being upset, it can cause you to be defensive and protective and this does not allow you to have empathy for other people or to hear what they want to say to you.

Approaching a conversation aggressively will make you feel upset and will put you and your partner in the defensive mode and cause them not to be able to hear what you or they are trying to say.

You have to learn to stop being blunt and stop approaching conflict in a way that the conversation will spiral out of control. Doing this will make your partner feel like you are blaming them or them being afraid to talk to you because they don’t know how you will react.

Conversations that have a lot of tension will cause there to be an immediate disconnect instead of a connection that can leave you feeling loved and heard. We have to decide what kind of cycle we are going to have when we decide to converse with people. Will you leave them feeling loved and protected or unloved and not valued?

No matter what kind of conversation you are having, you need to have a good intention. Look inside of yourself and figure out what you are doing wrong and figure out how to approach communication in the right way. Put your heart into the conversation and have patience and be aware as to how you are making the other person feel. Is your conversation coming from your heart? If the answer is no, this can lead to disagreements.

Change the way that you talk to people and this can make your relationship different. There are ways that you can soften yourself so that your relationship can be stronger.


Be aware of what you are feeling before you start talking to your partner. Make sure you are not having conversations where you are accusing them or if it is a touchy topic, be careful how you react.

Being aware is the key to being able to focus on what you are saying and being aware of what your heart is feeling. If you start talking and you realize you are feeling in a bad mood or you are angry, this is not the best time to talk to your partner.

Imagine the times where you have talked to someone and you have acted aggressively or angrily because you did not create a safe space to talk and you were not able to handle your emotions well. When you are aware of what you are doing, you will be aware of when the right time to talk is.

Slow Down

One reason that conflicts come in communication is because the conversation moves too fast. When you are reacting in this way, it can cause you not to be able to fix the problem. Even though you feel like you are responding from the right place in your heart, you have to make sure that you and your partner are being heard.

Slow down and figure out what you are really feeling. Explore your feelings inside and do not hide your emotions even when they are upsetting. Let your partner know what you are feeling and identify if you are happy, sad or even mad.

When you slow down, you allow your mind to connect with your body and you learn to express yourself without being so vulnerable. This can cause you not to accuse and to share your emotions in a compassionate and connected way.


Sometimes when we argue we think we are solving problems. We cannot do this if we do not understand things from our partners point of view. We do not always have to explain ourselves but sometimes we need to step back and allow our partner to be heard.

Make sure you are actively listening to what they are trying to tell you, and this can build trust and intimacy in your relationship. Do not interrupt and do not explain things, just allow them to talk.

When they finish speaking, repeat what they are sharing with you and let them know you heard them. Your partner wants to know that you are connected with them and this can bring a level of intimacy that you may not have had in the past.


These practices will help to save you from arguing and having terrible conversations. Learn to connect with your partner and to feel intimate with them both in body and in conversation. This can be impactful in your relationship and can allow there to be a beauty when you speak and communicate with each other.

Are You in a Relationship with an Old Soul?

There will come a time in most of our lives when we meet someone who feels familiar, like we have known them before even if it is a first meeting. We will have no way to logically explain the feeling, yet we may sense that something life changing is about to happen. These souls, regardless of actual age, race, or gender, show up spontaneously and create profound ripples that carry for years. All of this happens with a quiet word and loving presence. This person is likely an old soul.

Old Soul Defined

There are certain people in life who have outlooks and perspectives that vary greatly from most. These people perceive the world through the weathered eyes of an old person, not a young person. These people are often said to be wise beyond their years and may feel somewhat alienated from others. Still, there is a profound interconnectedness with life and a deep understanding even when they are children. The old soul is a natural sage, counselor and mystic that can provide guidance and support to others for a lifetime.

Having someone who is an old soul be part of your life is a huge blessing, yet it is very easy to take for granted. If you are fortunate enough to be part of this type of relationship, express gratitude for all the guidance and support they provide. If you are not sure you are in a relationship with an old soul, then look for the following signs.


An old soul tends to mimic behaviors of old people. They like to relax and unwind at home without a need to go out often. The mind is much more stimulating than the rest of the world, so why go out. If you are with an old soul, they will prefer to stay home.


Old souls are refreshed by solitude and find it restorative in nature. This is where they feel in touch with the core of life. Because of this, the old soul is content to spend long periods of time alone without concern. Since they have limited psychological energy to begin with, the old soul is thankful for alone time spent reading, tending gardens, or even completing a small project.

Little Things

Old souls treasure the little things in life and the small moments. They may place importance on watching a specific show together or long walks. The commonplace moments of intimacy are what they delight in as they see them as sincere. Knowing life is unpredictable, the old soul realizes transience in everything. This is why it is important to capture simple joys when possible.


Old souls walk to their own, quiet drums. This is their nature. Since they have different outlooks from most, they see the fallacies of social conditioning and seek truth that is often obscured. This may cause them to be odd in their fashion choices, mannerisms, beliefs, and perspectives. While they still appreciate tolerance and acceptance in relationships, it may be of eccentricities.

Profound Connections

For a relationship with an old soul to be successful, you must know the old soul is not about superficial connections. Old souls want to connect on deep, profound levels so the deepest of thoughts, dreams, and perspectives can be shared. This will bond you and them. Without this type of connection, they will move on.


Old souls are great teachers. Whether you need to learn to be empathetic, learn to accept others and yourself, or learn to be more gracious, an old soul can help. Old souls serve as both lovers and teachers, companions and mentors. While this odd mixture can cause problems, it can also be a perfect combination for long term happiness. Even if the relationship with an old soul ends, you will likely still admire and feel grateful for them and the lessons they taught.

There When Your Need It

Old souls are often a rock unless teaching you about fortitude or resilience. They are in it for the long haul, through thick and thin, even when life is unpredictable. Their ability to stay calm can get you through the darkest times of life allows you to trust immensely.

Elegant Taste

Many old souls are not really romantic in the traditional sense, but when they make an effort, their approach has that old world charm. They delight in sensitivity and symbolism. They may kiss your hand, pick a single flower, light candles, or offer jewelry as a symbolic piece. Whatever they choose to do, it will be full of meaning and significance.

No Games

Many couples get wrapped up in relationship ‘games’ that they believe create drama, but the old soul is not interested in playing or enabling such. If you are in a relationship with an old soul, expect a stern response to such games. They give and expect respect and will not waste time with such things.

Brutally Honest

Old souls appreciate and expect honesty for a loving, balanced relationship. If you are with an old soul, they will put emphasis on honesty from you and themselves. They will share whatever is on their mind and expect you to do the same.

May Seem Indifferent

The old soul does not see life as serious as others. They understand the reality of impermanence, so they never get overly attached to much of anything, whether good or bad. This can be interpreted incorrectly as being uncaring, but they are simply enjoying their balanced ride in their way.

Give and Expect Freedom

The best thing about being with an old soul is that they give you freedom over yourself and prefer you do the same for them. They want you to do your own thing without condition, but want you to be honest about it. They will be supportive of dreams and endeavors, but you must do the same for them if it is to last.

Unconditional Love

Old souls are able to accept most things pretty easily. While they may love you no matter what because they see your inner beauty, they will not be used. The get that a healthy relationship is about give and take, but if you are selfish or cheating and do not correct it, they will not be a martyr.

Less Likely to Cheat

Old souls are not saints, but they are not always that interested in sex or cheating. They prefer to be drama and conflict free, at least as much as possible. The old soul will be more likely to share feelings and thoughts with a partner than sexual acts. They are sexually active, but are rarely libido controlled.


Old souls will always give more than they take. If you are with an old soul, they will leave you feeling smarter, better, and an improved version of yourself, even if you do not stay together.


Take the time to think of all your old soul friend or partner has done for your life and enriched your world. Think about expressing thanks for all they do and have done because it is easy to take for granted. Enjoy this special opportunity to connect with someone so special before the mindlessness of life gets in the way.

Long Distance Relationships that Work

We are very connected in our world and we have the chance to meet new people and to find people all over the world. We don’t have to wait to find love because of the lack of opportunity and sometimes you can even find love thousands of miles away from where you live.

Having a long-distance relationship used to happen and people had a hard time making it work. Someone might move far away for a job or go into the military. People would have to learn to adapt to these changes and make room in their heart for this to be.

Now, we can have long distance relationships and with things such as the internet, we can even meet people purposefully that life far away.

There are challenges that long-distance relationships have that regular ones do not have but you can make it work if you try.

Here are some challenges with long distance relationships:

  • Having money to travel to where the new love lives.
  • Negotiating distances.
  • Not having long face-to face time.
  • Having trouble with the view of the relationship.
  • Having strong emotions.

Finances are a big deal when you are involved in a long-term relationship because flying is expensive and even if you drive, it can be costly buying food and having a place to stay when you visit.

It can be hard to manage a long-term relationship and people can sometimes get jealous because they do not get to hang out with your friends and get to know them. They might face a lot of complaining and they will lack in the intimate relationship that comes when you begin to fall in love.

By having boundaries and understanding, long term relationships can come but there will always be a chance of problems.

Expectations and Reality

We spend a lot of time with someone we are with and long-term relationships are not like that. You will not have the great sex or the romantic dinners that cause there to be more bonding. You will have expectations and will often be disappointed because things won’t be how you imagined them to be.

It is hard to dismiss the feelings when a relationship is growing, and this can cause trouble with distances. You will have stress of missing each other and even if you are committed it can be questionable because you don’t see how your partner is acting.

Research shows that you will have feelings of excitement, joy, anger, jealousy and other things that can cause a fight in a long-term relationship.


You can be successful and happy even though there are challenges in long term dating. Even if you are living close together does not mean your relationship will work and things just take time. You need to have open communication and that will bring success.

Always keep positive feelings and feel safe and secure unless they give you a reason to no. Learn to communicate over the phone and on facetime or other video chats rather than just texting. It is important that you will see each other, even if it is on video streaming. You can also save money so that you can meet up regularly.

The regular rules apply just like if you are in a close term relationship such as being open in communication, be clear about your needs, have trust, be intimate and always be kind and loving. When you talk on the phone, make sure that you are not making an option but a priority.


Long distance relationships are not as personal, but you can make them as personal as you can by communicating and having positive emotions. Treat them the same way that you would if someone lived close to you and you can see the relationship work.

When Your Soulmate is Looking for You

When you have a soulmate, and we all do, you will realize that you will get to a point where you are seeking them.  The good thing is, they are seeking you as well.

When you find that you want inspiration and joy in your life, you will notice that you might be attracted more to love.  You will seek divine answers and find that the journey of love is sometimes hard.

You might wonder why finding love is so hard but if you are looking for your soulmate, know that your heart is very wise and it knows what you have desired in your soul.  Your future self will come towards you and your soulmate will be working towards finding you.

When you find your soulmate, you will be thankful that you waited.  You will realize that this is more than a relationship and more than just an attraction to a man.  The great thing is, your soulmate wants the same things that you want and when you meet them, you will have a happy and healthy relationship with them.  Even your world will be turned upside down from his love.

The problem is that you can add blockages to your path because you date other people that you don’t really want to commit to.  You will compromise and find other people, and this will slow down your soulmate coming to you.

You may also find that you are not able to get past hurts in your past and this can cause you not to trust others.  When you doubt who you are, you don’t want other people coming into your life and you repeat this in your relationships instead of facing them.

You need to make sure that you are not standing in the way of your love.


You need to make sure that you are not in dead-end relationships and that you do not let yourself keep getting broken hearted again and again.  You must learn to let this go and move on from relationships that are unhealthy for you.

When you think about your vibrational frequency, when you have a high frequency, you will attract that and that is what your soulmate is made of.  You must go into wanting a relationship with joy and focus.  You must have self-love and happiness before you even begin a relationship.

Date someone and make sure that you know he or she is the one.  Let love win but do not go out of your way to be pleasing to someone that you know is not meant to be with you.  Time is short and this can hold you back.

Open your heart to yourself and to others and let your soulmate come.  By committing to this, you will open up your heart.

Learn to be open to relationships that are healthy for you and make sure that you are ready to be in a relationship before your soulmate comes.


Waiting for your soulmate can seem hard but you have to have enough respect for yourself and your soulmate that you are willing to wait until the right time.

The universe knows when it is time for you to meet your soulmate and so you have to always be open and ready.  You can be ready by being prepared in what life is meant to bring you and embracing it before your love comes.

Fixing a Relationship

When you are dating someone and care about them but then there are times that you cannot stand to be around them, chances are you need to move on and find someone else to date.  When you have a love-hate relationship, there will be emotions that can get out of control.  When a relationship is in existence, it is full of ups and downs anyways, so a love-hate relationship will be even worse.

Here are signs that you need to fix it or move on:


If there are parts of him that you love and you want to be with him, then you need to understand that there are qualities that you love and fix the relationship.


Then, there are parts of him that you cannot stand.  His behaviors annoy you and cause you to be aggravated.

Strong Emotions

Emotions in any relationship can be strong and, on the days, you love him, you really love him and on the other days, you are angry and upset with him.  There might not be mutual ground.

Breakup Makeup

The two of you will fight and break up and then get back together in a few hours.  You forget about the fight until the other one starts again.


You love your guy and you see him as a prize.  You don’t want to give up after you put in effort and you will stick around to see what happens next.


You feel that your relationship has no purpose and you are there just to not be lonely.  This type of relationship will not likely have a real future and you need to move on.


You don’t have a true connection with this person, and you don’t think he is important.  You love him but not deeply and you always fight.


You have feelings that are the same as his feelings.  Before you decide to move on, talk to them and see how he feels.  Does he feel that you are not getting along well?  Is the relationship worth fighting for?


If you love someone or have real feelings for them, you must communicate.  You have to find out if things can be fixed and if the relationship has a real future.  Find something to do that will improve your life.

Working Things Out

Decide if what you have is worth working on and if there is a chance to make the relationship strong.  Do you have the energy it takes to work on this and are you both willing to give your time for it?

Pros and Cons

Sit down and write a list of the pros and cons of the relationship and see if it is worth working out.  If it is, then you will know that it is meant to be.

Blame Game

In any relationship, not one person is at fault.  You are both doing things that can make the relationship feel sour.  You have to figure out how to fix things without blaming each other for what has went wrong.


Talk to a therapist or someone that does not have a commitment to either of you.  Talk to someone that can be neutral and tell them what is going on.  See if you can solve the love-hate relationship.


If you can work things out and let go of all of the hate, work them out.  If you cannot, let go of the relationship and start new.  This can allow you to have a deeper connection and to have new meaning to the relationship.

Will Your Ex Comes Back

After a breakup you will probably wonder if he or she will come back to you. The truth is that even if they come back to you, life will not be easy.  What will happen if they come back to you?  Will they stay?  Here are some reasons you should ask questions.

Wrong Reason

Remember, there are wrong and right reasons for an ex to come back.  If they come back for the wrong reasons, they won’t stay long and will cause you to have a broken heart again.


Your ex might realize he or she was wrong and come back.

They will realize that they left for the wrong reasons and will come back to you, or they will come back and not have any value for you or the relationship.  If there are true feelings left, then they might stay, but if the feelings are not there, chances are they will leave you again.

Do you really want to go back to your ex and chance getting your heart broken again?

Good Reasons

If your ex comes back and there is a good reason that they come back, this will probably be a long-term fix and they probably won’t leave you again.

Getting Them to Come Back

If you want to get your ex to come back, you need to pay attention to these rules and follow them.


Don’t rush them.  Do not seem desperate or try to win them back.  This can cause them to come back at the wrong time and for the wrong reason.  Don’t be so trusting and make them come back and rebuild the trust that you had for them before.

You need to take advantage of knowing who they are and if they are coming to make your life better or if you are going to get hurt again.  If you let them come back to you after a breakup, you need to do this:

Be More Attractive

When you want them back, you need to not allow them to touch you.  Do not have sex with them right away and make them look at you and chase you.

Being close to them and not allowing them to touch you or be with you can cause them to want you more.  You need to make sure that your issues are resolved before you decide to get into an intimate relationship again.

Correct the Problems

If you know why you and your ex broke up, you need to work on making things better.  You need to figure out what needs you have and make sure that they are willing to meet them this time.  Make sure there is no negativity and that you are not being selfish.

If you want them to come back, improve yourself as well.  You shouldn’t announce that your ex is coming back or bribe them to see you but do things in your life to make you better and they will see that you are attractive and will want you.

Don’t be sensitive and allow the issues to be addressed and fixed before you ever take them back.


Focus on who you are and what you want.  Why do you want to give them another chance?  Let them see that you have passions outside of the relationship and find new hobbies and friends.  Give them something to look forward to about you and when they come back, don’t be clingy.

Take time to be apart and see if you even miss them.

Signs They Will Come Back

When you want them to come back to you, your ex will give you signs if this is going to happen.  When you want them back, you miss them, and you are always spying on them on social media or asking people what they are doing.

It doesn’t make sense to you why they left you in the first place and why they said they would never leave you and then they did.  You will wonder if they even loved you ever.

Your pain will cause your mind to try to find answers and not to be confused.  Your brain will give you signs that your ex is going to come back or that you need to do something to get them back.  Your brain will give you different reasons as to why you should be with them.

Know that there are clues that your ex will come back and you need to pay attention to them and see if they are worth it.

Stop Looking

When you still love them, it is hard to stop looking for them.  You might even feel like you are obsessed with what they are doing, and you might always be trying to find out what they are doing.

If you are looking for signs that they are still interested, you need to look for these signs:

  • They start talking to you again.
  • They talk about the past and what went wrong.
  • They ask your friends about you.
  • They are curious about you.
  • They seem jealous when they see you with other people.
  • They tell you things about them that are private.
  • They try to find out if you are dating someone.
  • They give you information that they are single.
  • They blame themselves for breaking up with you.
  • They make excuses to see you that are weird.
  • They admit that they have dreams about you.


The truth is if your ex comes back, can you really trust them.  If they want to come back, they will find a way back to you.

Your ex will come back for different reasons and the way to get them back is to make sure that they are attracted to you, even more than before.

You can show them that things have changed and that you are a different person.  You can practice being kind and having good relationship skills.  Learn to be about others and not to be selfish.  Remember that love and commitment go hand in hand and make sure you are ready to settle down before they come back.

How to Tell the Difference between Real and Fake Love

Everyone wants love. They want to know that someone will love them unconditionally and accept them as they are. They want someone who will be there forever. However, many people looking for the real thing fall for fake love instead.

Fake love feels like love at first. It’s exciting and comes with all the butterflies and breathless whispers. Yet, it isn’t real and never lasts. How do you know the difference?

There are 20 ways to distinguish real love from its counterfeit cousin:

  1. True love will sacrifice for others.

This is a true test of love because those who are in fake love will only have concerns for themselves. They want things to be “fair” and ensure they are getting something out of the relationship rather than how the other person’s needs are met. Ideally, if both are sacrificing for the other, then there won’t be a need to weigh the scales on who gives more.

  1. True love loves truth.

Those with real love can’t live with lies. Truth resolves insecurities and doubts. It builds trust. Fake love lives in lies where people say what they believe the other wants to hear.

  1. Kindness rules in true love.

Real love is overabundant in love and care. It implements generosity and is compassionate. Fake love will cut you and offer pain, even to those who don’t deserve it, because pain suits the purposes of those who are dishing it out.

  1. Real love is patient.

People who are really in love will overlook flaws and shortcomings. They give you multiple chances to change and will wait until you make that move. Those in fake love get angry quickly when you don’t meet their expectations or don’t conform to their standards. They will judge and punish you without hearing your side.

  1. True love has humility.

Those who know how to love don’t care who gets the credit. A person like this admits to their mistakes and seeks to lift others instead of putting themselves in the spotlight. Fake love is the opposite. Those people are proud, want all the attention they can get and grabs credit whenever possible, even if it means hurting someone they love. They will not accept blame either but will blame others for their mistakes.

  1. Real love is fulfilling.

Those who are really in love feel completed. They are happy where they are and enjoy every moment. Fake love wants more. It is always destination-oriented where you think you’ll be happy when something else happens when you get that new job, that new house, a child, retirement and all the rest.

  1. True love shows gratitude.

People who love feel blessed with what they have and don’t need anything else. It finds anything you give is a treasure, even if it is a small item. Fake love belittles you. You can’t give good enough gifts. People who are in fake love feel unlucky to be with you and are constantly feeling like others have more and better lives, which amounts to jealousy.

  1. Real love brings joy.

True love is positive and creates a cheerful heart. You are happy when others are happy. Fake love is bitter and negative. People who use fake love thinks life is unfair, they are the victim and hold grudges.

  1. True love respects.

Those who love you will show respect to you. That includes your decisions, opinions, hopes, and dreams. It seeks to honor you. Fake love doesn’t care about what you think because it is arrogant. You are inferior in this person’s eyes.

  1. Real love protects.

Those who live in true love seek to protect others from pain. It will shield you from things that will cause long-term pain. It protects the relationship from things that would hurt it. Fake love offers only false satisfaction and is temporary.

  1. Righteous dominates true love.

Those with true love have maturity and wisdom. It makes decisions and takes actions discreetly. Fake love acts foolishly. It’s narrow-minded and acts childishly. It is self-righteous and initiates reckless actions.

  1. True love gets you.

Those who truly love you get to know you as a person. It seeks out to know you better so that a person can love you more. It can connect with you without you saying anything because this person can feel your emotions and know what you’re thinking. Fake love doesn’t care about your feelings or thoughts and doesn’t care what is going on in your life.

  1. Trust comes with true love.

A person who loves you has confidence in you. That person trusts you will do the right thing and make good decisions. Those in a fake love relationship are negative about everything you do because they can’t trust you and don’t think you are capable of making good decisions.

  1. True love brings loyalty.

When you love someone, you are willing to make a strong commitment. You avoid temptations to cheat. Those involved in fake love will experience cheating.

  1. True love is faithful.

Those who love believe in you even with your weaknesses and failures. Fake love requires total assurance that you are dependable before someone like that will believe in you.

  1. There is hope in true love.

Those who love can see the future and you in it. They will fight for your relationship. Fake love isn’t permanent, so you aren’t important. They will easily give up on you.

  1. True love wants to enhance.

People who operate in real love always want what’s best for you. They fear letting you down and act out of passion, energy, and excitement. Those who work out of fake love are apathetic and tend to make excuses for not fulfilling obligations.

  1. True love takes care of itself.

Those who love others have already learned to love themselves. They take care of themselves in body, mind, and soul so they can be strong and healthy for a relationship with you. Those who have fake love don’t care about maintaining health. It can even be self-destructive.

  1. Real love grows.

Those in a true love relationship want to grow both personally and in the relationship. You want to be a better person because of it. Those who have fake love seek to argue and fight. It can’t settle things calmly and creates a toxic relationship.

  1. True love lasts.

True love will be forever. It can’t be destroyed even in distance or death. The stories of those who sacrifice for true love inspire people from generation to generation. Those who submit to fake love have relationships that are short-lived because it disappears when it can no longer get what it wants.

Knowing the difference between true love and fake love will, hopefully, help you find the real thing. True love is something worth waiting for and taking your time with after you meet someone special.

Have Luck in Love

Being lucky in love doesn’t mean that you are going to be completely happy or that life isn’t going to be full of challenges.  When you find love, you will realize that not everyone is the same and you need to try new things and do your best to make sure that you are giving your best and finding the perfect relationship.

Finding the perfect love is like trying to find the perfect pair of jeans.  You may get lucky and find someone that fits you perfectly, but you might not find someone that is a perfect fit.  Finding someone that is a best friend can make your relationship stronger and the day you meet them can be the beginning of your story.

Settling for someone is not a good idea and when you are looking for someone to meet, you will know that you have gotten lucky in love.

Luck in marriage does not just happen, being lucky in love means that you have to work at finding the right relationship, work at making your significant other happy and focus on what each other wants.

When you focus towards finding a way to make your partner happy, you will feel that you are lucky in love and you will feel that life is fulfilling for you.

When life happens, it is hard to find people that meet your expectations and your needs.  You want to be the center of attention and you want to find someone that puts you first.

When you are single, finding the right person can seem impossible.  It can be hard to figure out the dating scene and to figure out how to be excited by the partners that you meet.

Especially, if you have experienced a lot of losses or a lot of people that don’t fit your hopes and dreams, finding the perfect love can seem virtually impossible.

Online Dating

Trying online dating is a good idea and can help you to put yourself out there.  You may never find someone that is perfect for you and you may realize that you are single for a reason, after going on some of your dates.

You should check out at least five different people on your dating app before you choose to move on.  The brain is made to prevent you from interacting with new people because it doesn’t always see things as right.  If you have too many choices, your brain will make it feel like love is impossible and you will become uninterested.

What You Want

If you want to get lucky, figure out what you want.  Make a list of what you are looking for and figure out what characteristics you want in a partner.  Connect with people with traits from your list, but also connect with people that are the complete opposite.

Finding people that are different can show you what other things feel like and can make you want to change your idea of what a perfect lover is.

When you find someone special, luck could happen.  Find people that love the same things you love and want to do the same things that you love to do.  Worry more about what you will stay home and watch on tv with your partner than what characteristics you see that are negative in them.

Being Lucky in Love

Figure out what being lucky in love means to you.  What makes you feel romantic and what makes you desire your partner?  Find things that get you excited and that stimulates that dopamine in your brain.  If they don’t make you have these feelings of excitement, chances are you are not finding luck in love.


When you think about being lucky in love, you might think about playing the lottery or being struck by lightning.  Even though this can be a big thing, finding luck in love can happen.  Figure out what you want and put yourself out to find and understand what love really is.

When You Date a Baby Daddy

There are times when the universe might set you up to date a baby daddy.  These types of relationships can be rewarding and fulfilling.  Sometimes, the idea of dating a baby daddy is not what you want, and you might avoid the situation all together, but you might reconsider it if you meet the right baby daddy.  There are some things that you should know when you are dating someone that has kids, and these are important things to remember all the time.

Being Number 1

If you want to be number 1 in someone’s life, you should never date a baby daddy.  The kids will always be number 1 in his life and they will be living with their dad, at least here and there, until they are 18 years old.

You have to understand that when he spends time with his kids that they are going to want him, and he is going to trust that you will help him with the kids when they are crying or into things.  A dad always will put his kids first without making you feel that you are neglected.


A baby daddy has baggage because he has an ex and kids.  This will not be easy and might come with some emotional baggage which might make him not commit to you as fast as you would like.

A man that has a kid has been through a lot and is still trying to figure out if it is worth having another romantic partner or not.


If you are the jealous type, this relationship might not be for you.  The guy will have a mother of his kid and they might hate each other but they might be bonded because of their child.  If you get jealous easily, this might not be the perfect idea for you, or you need to learn not to be jealous.


When you date a guy that has kids, chances are that he will have to figure out his schedule and that it will change, and maybe often.  If you are not the flexible type, you might want to consider dating someone that isn’t tied up in a family already.

He won’t play games with you or mess with your head, but if it means that he has to change his schedule to see his kids, he will.  Not all dads are upstanding, and some do not care about your time so make sure you pick a good one.

Having Kids

Remember, just because this guy has a kid, it doesn’t mean he wants to have one with you or that he is ready to have another kid period.  A man’s status as a father doesn’t mean that he wants to make babies every time he dates someone new.

If you want to know if he wants to have kids, ask him and don’t just jump to conclusions that he does.

Mending a Broken Heart

When we fall in love, chances are that we will end up with some type of broken heart, at least a time or two.  It is never easy to mend a broken heart and there is no way to stop your heart from hurting fast.  When you love someone deeply, chances are in rejection that you will have pain.  Here are some ideas on how to lessen your heart pain and move on.

Work Through It

You have to work through heart pain and not try to avoid it.  You have to grieve so that you can move on.  Go through the pain so that you can make sure that it is taken care of and that it doesn’t surface again later.

Be Independent

Try to find ways to get rid of the void that you are having without starting a new relationship.  You can detach from a relationship and find peace in other things that you do.

Even if you are sad, try to get rid of the grief with your own life and find things to fill your emptiness that are creative and fun.


If you feel defeated, you have to figure out what you are good at and what is good about you.  Build up your self-esteem and tackle some new challenges.


Take time to think about other things that excite you including sex.  Find something to fantasize about that makes you happy.

Help People

If you are suffering, find someone to help and this can help you to recover faster.  When you help another person that is struggling, it helps you to forget your own pain.

Laugh or Cry

Laughing can help you to heal but crying can do.  Sometimes a person needs a good cry in order to move on with their life.  Take time to have these cries and get rid of the toxic substances in your emotions.


Make a list on which activities can bring you joy.  Write these things down and work on doing things on your list that make you happy.  Write a list of things that do not make you happy and try to avoid doing these things as much as you can.

Work Out

Work on getting rid of your grief by working out.  Join a walking group or go swimming.  Find a physical activity that you love to do and find people that you can have like minds with.

Create Your Own World

Create a world of your own where you don’t allow negative energy in it.  Get rid of people in your life that bring you down and find friends that can lift you up and make you happy.


Always look for hope.  There is an emotion that is stronger than fear and loneliness and that is hope.  This is to believe that something better is going to come. Don’t be afraid to move on and to see what the world has in store for you, and always hope it is something great.  Forgive your past, yourself and move on.


When your heart is broken when a relationship ends, you have the option to close yourself off or to figure out how to heal.  Love again and deepen the love you have for family and friends.  Find way sot move on and to find happiness within yourself and within others.